"Quotes in Quotes in Quotes..."

"...add another quote and make it a gallon."

--Groucho Marx (in Animal Crackers)

20th century American comedian

There is a quote for almost everything under the sun. In fact, there's probably a quote about making quotes under the sun. So, I figured I'd break out a collection of exciting quotes I have accidentally remembered throughout my random accretion of information (...but looked up for proper wording).

The theme is randomness, in case you were wondering.

"Hunger is the best pickle."
--Benjamin Franklin,
18th century American statesman

This is a strange and rare quote from Benjamin Franklin. Pickles were one of the most common appetizers in America during later 1700s. This quote essentially says "If you don't eat anything you'll be hungrier." An outspoken proponent of moderation and a well-honed lifestyle (not so much a practitioner), Franklin doesn't want you to fill up on pickles before your next big meal. I would be remiss if I didn't link you to what some other crazy people say the meaning of the quote is (the meaning of pickle as 'a difficult situation' has been around longer than pickle as a food (although pickle as a sauce is oldest of all)). You'd be surprised how often this shows up on cooking websites talking about pickles...little do they know they are promoting abstinence from pickles.

"The first casualty of war is truth."
--Aeschylus,
Greek playwright

Americans tend to see this in every war - the curbing of civil liberties during wartime. The latest pair of conflicts are two of the latest casualties, but many past wars have seen a restriction on the freedom of press and speech (and occasionally assembly). Unfortunately Iraq and Afghanistan may end up being a bit more of a special case, considering the perpetual nature of discontent (and subsequently, terrorism). Aeschylus just tells us it's not a unique American phenomenon, and that leaders just don't like to tell the populace everything is going to hell.

"...going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. You just leave a lot of useless, noisy baggage behind."
--Jed Babbin,
onetime US Deputy Undersecretary of Defense

He may be a Republican who believes in a liberal-driven media, but at least he's got some good French comedy. Although, France really writes its own jokes, sometimes. That's right, I photoshopped a picture of an accordion wearing a beret - I would have thrown a loaf of French bread in there but that would have been too many French clichés, even for me.

"Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself."
--Samuel Clemens 'Mark Twain',

19th century American humorist and author

Here we see that mockery of the American legislative system and the crazy kooks in the Capitol is not limited to our own century. Twain has lots of good comedy and interesting anecdotes, unfortunately they're usually not at a quotable length. His essay The Awful German Language seemed to be a favorite of one of my German professors (who excerpted it at two seperate awards ceremonies).

"Perfection is attained not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away."
--Antoine de Saint-Exupery,
20th century French aviator and author

Some might remember this quote from when you discover Engineering in Civilization IV (and Leonard Nimoy reads it awesomely). It is from Saint-Exupery's memoir Terre des Hommes (literally Land of Men; published as Wind, Sand and Stars in English) of when he flew mail routes in South America and the Sahara, published in 1939. I don't know French, so I can't give you a fancy context, unfortunately. We do know he's an awesome Frenchman though, since the crux of his book deals with a plane crash in the Sahara in 1934 and him wandering to civilization with his navigator.

"Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel."
--Samuel Johnson,
18th century English author

This is often misinterpreted to mean that anyone who believes in patriotism is a scoundrel. Taken in the context of Johnson's contemporary biographer (and friend) James Boswell's words, Johnson was referring to false patriotism - those who would hide their misdeeds behind a veil of ingenuine patriotism. Considering he was an Englishman and that whole 'American revolution' thing was going on, it has been suggested that he was referring to Edmund Burke.

Now, why the post of quotes? So you can avoid being berated by people who insist that using quotes isn't the perogative of intelligent people...by using quotes themselves.

"Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them."
--Samuel Palmer,
19th century painter and writer

Strangely enough, this is the only unsourced quote in my list. No one is sure if this quote exists, because Palmer's son, Alfred, burned a bunch of his father's papers so that they wouldn't fall under the public's watchful eye (despite the fact that almost no one knew who his father was when he did it). History will show Alfred was a douche.

"A facility for quotation covers the absence of original thought."
--Dorothy L. Sayers (Lord Peter Wimsey in "Gaudy Night").
20th century British author

But this one is also cheating, because it's said by the author through a character in a work of fiction.

Now I'm all quoted out.

The Dinosaurs are Dead

I'm no literary afficianado. My time spent with reading is usually limited to my course-related historical non-fiction or (admittedly less exciting) textbooks, but I'll tell you that Michael Crichton - from Andromeda Strain to Jurassic Park, from Timeline to Prey - was my favorite author. I say "was", because unfortunately Crichton passed away due to cancer on November 4th (maybe you missed it due to that whole "electing a new President"-thing). 

A Chicago native, he majored in anthropology at Harvard and eventually wrote novels while studying at Harvard Medical. Originally he had planned on majoring in English literature, but an exchange with one of his professors changed his mind. Suspecting the professor of intentionally handing him poor grades, he plagiarized a paper by George Orwell (informing another professor beforehand). He got a B-. His first major successful novel, Andromeda Strain, was published under a psuedonym while he was still at Med School, but soon his attention would be turned towards using his new found medical terminology and academic education to create 'techno-thrillers' and 'near future science fiction' (as well as non-fiction like Travels and Five Patients and the TV show ER).

 

Now, my enjoyment of Crichton began in 4th grade SSR periods (That's Silent Sustained Reading, not that it usually followed any of those three criteria). Maybe it was my love of dinosaurs, maybe it was the inclusion of complex scientific theories (or maybe it was the copious amounts of swear words), but I loved that book. I can tell you right now that if Ray Bradbury's bibliocaustic society ever manifests itself, I'll be the first one running off into the woods and staking a claim on Jurassic Park (I'm already half way there: "The sign said ELECTRIFIED FENCE 10,000 VOLTS DO NOT TOUCH, but Nedry opened it with his bare hand...").

Despite the years of R.L. Stine and the Boxcar Children, Sideways Storys from Wayside School and Choose Your Own Adventure novels, I always came back to Jurassic Park. Even when it was tattered and torn, kicked down the halls of middle school, and missing the ending I still kept it. It's been retired now - sitting in my desk at home, its position filled by a double that cost $0.25 at the Salvation Army. Accompanied by a version of the book in German.

Appendicitis is no treat, but it's much better with Timeline and Sphere to entertain you. And weekends without video games were just that bit easier when you could borrow Andromeda Strain and Congo from the Door County Public Library. He may not be known for his sweeping literary themes and timeless masterpieces, but I can guarantee you no one's building a dinosaur themepark in the future without some careful considerations.

requiescat in pace